The Solution to Wedding Guest Nightmares
How to Deal With the Mistakes Wedding Invitees Make
May 6, 2009
When getting married, it’s inevitable to come across wedding guests that don’t follow the wedding guest etiquette. Therefore it is very important that to react in the right manner and preferably before the wedding day. In other words: be proactive and add these possible problems to the wedding planning checklist so that they won’t ruin the wedding.
Guests Ignoring the Wedding RSVP
Problem: One of the problems when sending wedding reception invitations is the wedding RSVP card. Some guests will look at the card, forget about it and never let the couple know that they will be attending the wedding. This is terrible for the engaged couple because they need to let the caterer know how many people are coming and they need to work out the seating chart.
Solution: Make the date by which guests need to reply as early as possible. If the caterer needs to know the exact headcount two weeks before the wedding, then ask people to RSVP three or four weeks before the wedding. Call guests who ignored the wedding RSVP card and ask them there and then to decide on whether or not they are attending.
Guests Bringing an Uninvited Wedding Guest
Problem: That sixteen-year-old niece Carol has a boyfriend now and she wants to bring him to the wedding. She fills in the wedding RSVP card to say that the two of them will be attending the wedding, even though the card did not read: ‘Carol and guest’.
Solution: This is a very awkward situation, for the guest as well as for the happy couple. Call up the guest and explain that there has been a misunderstanding. Tell the misguided person that the wedding has a strict guest list and that you cannot make exceptions. Before you know it, every niece or cousin will bring a partner and there is just not enough room or money for a situation like that.
Guests Requesting Songs
Problem: Requesting songs can be fine, but only if this does not bother the married couple. If they spent hours creating the perfect track list, then they will not be happy to have their songs suddenly interrupted by a dance version of Johnny Wakelin’s ‘In Zaire’. Or even worse: a wedding guest asks the wedding DJ to play a romantic song that happens to be the song of the bride and her ex-boyfriend.
Solution: Not too fond of other songs at the wedding? Then tell the wedding DJ to politely refuse playing anything that is not on the track list. If it’s not a big deal for the happy couple, but there are certain songs they don’t want to hear, they should give the DJ a list with songs that can absolutely not be played. Examples include: songs that remind the couple of ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends, songs that were played during the funeral of a relative or songs the couple just can’t stand.
Wedding Guests that Feel They Should Give a Toast
Problem: A drunk uncle thinks it’s funny to give a toast and tell some embarrassing stories about the happy couple. The anecdote makes the bride and groom want to die with shame and totally ruins their evening.
Solution: Make an agreement with your wedding DJ: tell him or her not to give the microphone for speeches to anyone that was not supposed to give a speech. Should a drunk uncle be able to start his toast anyway, have him gently but firmly removed from the microphone immediately.
Do not Worry too Much
The best thing to do in order to avoid these problems is being prepared, but it’s not possible to foresee everything. Try not to stress out about what could happen and just enjoy the perfect wedding day!
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