Throwing any party—including a wedding—takes money. You’ll need clothing, decorations, food, and place to entertain your guests…and that all needs to be paid for.
But while figuring out how to finance your wedding isn’t usually very fun, it’s also fairly easy.
What Kind Of Wedding Will You Have?
First, get a general idea of the type of wedding you and your fiancé want. Will it be a large affair, or a more intimate, private one? Will you invite your guests to a black-tie sit-down dinner, or a casual picnic at a lake?
Keep in mind that, unless you have a definite source of unlimited funds (a rich uncle, perhaps?), you’ll need to balance the size of the guest list with the type of wedding you want. If you want expensive food and a lavish location, you might have to leave some people out—and that could lead to hard feelings and resentment all around. On the other hand, inviting three hundred people might make it difficult to have an open bar or a five-course meal.
Keep in mind that guests are usually going to be more important than style. Having Aunt Millie there with you will matter more that having the expensive tablecloths or the embroidered napkins, because no matter how simple your day is, you’ll have an amazing time with the people you love!
Who Pays?
Once you know what kind of wedding you want, it’s time to figure out who pays for what. If you know you’re paying for everything yourselves, skip this part; if you’ve been offered or want financial help, keep reading.
Sit down with those relatives or friends who have offered to chip in, and ask what they’d like to pay for. Be honest with them about what you can cover yourselves and what you might need help with. Also, keep them informed as to what other family members have offered to purchase.
If no one has offered but you’d like to ask your parents or in-laws for a little something, sit down and ask them, honestly and openly but without pressuring them, if they would mind helping out. If they refuse, don’t push the issue—it’s your wedding, and therefore your responsibility. You’re an adult, and your parents or other relatives don’t “owe” you financial help.
Figure Out How Much You Have
Now that you know how much you’ll be paying for, figure out how much you can afford to spend. Remember that, as much as a wedding is a very special moment in your life, it’s the marriage that really matters, and you’ll need money to help get you started in your new life together. Don’t blow everything you have on throwing a lavish party.
Be realistic— look at how much you both make, how much you have in savings, how much you’re willing to sacrifice to save up for the event, and how much time you have before the big day. Don’t go into debt for your wedding, and don’t borrow a lot of money from friends or family. A small or simple wedding is just as beautiful and meaningful as a large or opulent one.
If you’re worried about being able to afford your wedding, there’s nothing wrong with a long engagement! You can set a date for two or three years from now, and then spend that time saving up.
Make A Budget
Once you have a ballpark figure for how much the wedding will cost, figure out how much you can spend on each aspect— your dress, the flowers, the venue fees, etc. You can use a budget calculator, like this one from The Knot.
If you don’t want to spend money on a particular aspect of your wedding—don't! There’s no rule that says you need to have flowers or a sit down dinner or a limo—just use tulle as decoration, or have a dessert reception, or drive your own car.
And always keep this in mind: a wedding is a special day, but it shouldn’t bankrupt you. Dream weddings can be economical and prudent, and still be lovely and special, too!
