Etiquette for Destination Brides
Tips for Planning a Destination Wedding in an Foreign Locale
May 3, 2008
So you've decided to hold your nuptials at that distant locale you've always dreamed about. Now you're probably wondering just where to begin. Here are some simple do's and don'ts to help you navigate through your journey to becoming the perfect destination bride!
Do Save the Date
Ideally, "save-the-date" cards for a destination wedding should be mailed out six months before the wedding date. The advance notice will give guests the opportunity to earmark vacation time and to begin budgeting for travel and lodging.
Do Trim the Guest List
When planning a destination wedding, keep your guest list simple. Don't assume that because your wedding is being held abroad most guests won't show up. As you extend invitations, bear in mind that nearly 70 percent of people invited to a destination wedding actually attend. And if you've selected an exciting location you can count on a good number of family and friends traveling to witness your nuptials.
Don't Feel Compelled to Pay for Guests' Travel Expenses
Typically, invitees pay for their own travel and accommodations but proper etiquette dictates that you price airline tickets and hotel rooms. If you are having your wedding at a relatively expensive property, research and offer a list of more affordable lodging options at nearby properties. Make sure that transportation will not present an issue.
Do Book Early
Be sure to book reservations early so that you can negotiate discounted group fares and room rates. Even better, hire a travel consultant to handle all of the travel logistics, which could become intricate, especially if you have guests leaving from different parts of the country or world.
Do Pay for Food & Beverages
While guests pay for their airfare and lodging, the bride and groom are expected to pick up the tab for food and beverages. To help manage costs, consider having your wedding at an all-inclusive resort.
Do Invite All Guests to Rehearsal Dinner
Normally the bridal party, immediate family and out-of-town guests are invited to the rehearsal dinner, but with a destination wedding it is proper to invite everyone who has traveled to attend your affair. If covering dinner for all of your guests is out of your budget, simply invite the wedding party and close family to dinner. Extend an additional invitation to everyone else to join you later in the evening for drinks and dessert.
Do Delegate Shower & Wedding Gift Duties
Overall, inviting guests to your shower but not your wedding is poor etiquette. The destination wedding is one exception to this rule. As with all weddings, just be sure to assign a relative or someone from your wedding party to inform guests that your wedding will be a very intimate affair attended by a small number of guests.
As for wedding gifts, never mention them in the wedding invitation. Instead, once again, have a member of the family or your bridal party spread the word about your registry and where to send gifts.
Do Your Guests a Favor
Show guests how grateful you are for their journey to witness your marriage with a favor they will cherish. If everyone is staying at the same hotel or resort, arrange to have a small token of your appreciation waiting at the front desk for check-in. You might also consider creating a themed welcome basket and have it waiting in their rooms for their arrival. Be sure to include local maps or area guides and a list of activities.
