With a do-it-yourself philosophy flourishing in arenas from indie craft fairs to empowering television programs, it's no wonder many brides are choosing to take the reins when it comes to the biggest day of their lives. Before you take on too much in the wedding planning process, ponder what resources are available, what's most important to you, and what's realistic:
Consider Your Budget
A budget involves more than a grand total dollar amount. Budgeting is about making choices. Are there areas in which cutting corners is an option? Are there areas in which you feel top-dollar expertise is absolutely necessary?
Your priorities will dictate how you spend the money available to you. For example, one bride may decide she's comfortable having a family friend provide floral arrangements for the big event yet insist on having her make-up professionally done because this brings her peace of mind on her wedding day. No two brides will have the same must-haves. Figure out what matters most to you.
Begin by listing all of the areas that are non-negotiable in terms of lowering costs. Does a large family make a hefty chair rental expense unavoidable? Have you always dreamed of renting a classic vehicle for your getaway car?
Make a second column of negotiable expenses, listing areas in which you're willing to cut corners or do it yourself.
Note Your Talents
Identify what you are able and willing to contribute to the wedding experience. For example, you may have a knack for arranging flowers, but this does not mean you truly want to spend hours leading up to the ceremony creating, transporting and touching up your wedding centerpieces.
Ask the following questions:
- What are your special skills and talents?
- Do any of these talents translate to wedding-specific duties? For example, if you're skilled at gift wrapping, would you be comfortable creating your own wedding favor packaging?
- If you are not particularly crafty, could you use your organizational skills to oversee portions of the wedding planning process?
- Do any of your desired do-it-yourself activities require spending large portions of time working on your actual wedding day? You may want to enlist the help of others if this is the case.
Not even the most organized of brides can do it all herself. Now that you have a better idea of areas in which you need to budget, are wanting to take charge, or could use a helping hand, consider seeking assistance from those who are willing and able, such as:
- friends and family members with whom you've shared your support and talent in the past
- acquaintances, friends and family members who are experts in any wedding-related area, such as photography, cooking, floral design, music (including DJing), graphic design (for invitation assistance) and event planning
- friends and family members who have recently wed and understand the planning process
The key to enlisting the talents of others is not to ask too much of any one person. Be respectful and understanding if certain individuals are not able to help as much as you'd hoped. Some may offer to lend their services for the entire event, but if possible, limit the helpers' duties so they can enjoy a portion of the festivities as carefree guests.
As you begin to inquire about the availability of time and talent, you will get a sense of who is truly willing to help vs. who feels overwhelmed or obligated. Do yourself a favor and let folks off the hook if they do not seem interested in helping. Your big day will run smoothly if responsible, genuinely helpful individuals are willingly overseeing some of the duties involved.
That said, once you let it be known that you're in search of helping hands, you may be surprised by the people who happily step forward.
While some may lend their talents at no cost, consider the possibility of swapping services. For example, a graphic designer may offer to create the wedding invitations for her friend the chef, who in turn bakes the cake for the graphic designer's nuptials the following year; or a bride may ask a friend to distribute wedding favors at each place setting before the reception begins, agreeing to provide the friend with similar help the day of her wedding.
Delegate
At this point, really stop and ask yourself, "Have I taken on too much?"
Especially if you're using your time and talents to save money throughout the wedding planning process, you want to fully enjoy the fruits of your labor once the big day arrives. Yes, there are parts of your wedding day that will be a blur no matter how much you try to step back and take it all in. However, having to rush to get ready because you've put yourself in charge of table arrangements is less than ideal.
If you're not using a wedding planner, consider hiring a "day of" wedding coordinator to manage the details on your big day. This worthwhile expense will allow you to be fully present in the festivities without tending to behind-the-scenes matters and mishaps.
If a day of coordinator is not in the budget, ask for help in the following areas:
- placing wedding favors at each table setting
- greeting vendors as they arrive at the reception site, directing them to their set-up locations
- monitoring the pre-ceremony time frame, giving gentle reminders to the wedding party as needed
- ensuring the vendors are staying on schedule
- tracking the reception schedule, nudging wedding participants at key times, such as toasts and dances
- paying vendors at the end of the evening
- assisting with any tasks you've chosen to do yourself, such as floral arranging and decorating
Do It Yourself
DIY wedding planning is as much about delegating as doing it yourself. Brides with a DIY attitude find that a little help frees up time and energy so they can truly enjoy making the best use of their talents.
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